I know you've been waiting for this post for a long, long time. Who doesn't want to make a homemade chia pet? I mean regular chia pets are SO...unusual, but homemade chia pets? Unstoppably weird. And, ladies, don't tell me you haven't been looking for a way to recycle those outdated pantyhose contraptions. They're just awkward as windsocks, and I know you don't actually wear them, so you might as well make chia pets.
Cut the foot part off--about 4 inches worth. (Warning: Make sure you aren't wearing them at this stage.)
Drop a small hand full of grass seed in the bottom and fill the rest with dirt. (Again, it's best if you aren't wearing them.)
Put a 4 inch "water wick" into the dirt, twist the end and tie it off with a twisty tie.
Cut off the excess pantyhose.
Decorate. I'll leave this up to you. This is pretty personal, so I don't want to influence you in the creative process.
Soak the whole thing in water, and put under a cup or whatever you have on hand until it sprouts.
Enjoy. Or, you know, come to grips with whatever feelings you might have about chia pets.